Anxiety

I've been learning a lot about myself lately. One thing that has become increasingly clear to me is that I have some severe anxiety issues. If you know me well, I'm sure this has been obvious to you. But to me, I think I've been in denial for a very long time.

I never realized how anxious I get about silly little things. I find myself blowing things out of proportion, and I seem to want to carry everyone's burdens on myself. I'm a problem solver I think... or I like to try to be. It's a pretty unfortunate aspect of myself that I am learning to surrender to the Lord.

In light of this, I have become increasingly anxious about my health issues lately. My stomach has been acting up again (it seems to do this every 4 years or so), and I am finding myself, once again, back in doctor's offices, getting tests done, and eating less and less. Many say that my anxiety is causing my stomach problems. Others say that my stomach problems are causing my anxiety. I'm pretty sure it's this vicious cycle between the two. Added into (and perhaps conducting) this cycle is spiritual warfare keeping me from believing that God is in control, that He is good, that I can rest in Him. My desire is to know Him, to worship Him, to love Him, and to surrender this to Him.

More updates to come as I find out more results of exams, etc. In the meantime, prayers would be much appreciated!